Tuesday, 12 August 2014

Heavy Sweetness Ash-Like Frost: Translation (Chapter 15.3: Under the Faint Purplish Red Moon)


 
   After translating the last of Chapter 15, I couldn't help being impressed by the delicacy of Dian Xian's writing - the moon light, the ripples in the water, the red phoenix flowers, the incinerating gaze, the feeling that teeters between pain and pleasure. So, this is love?

Chapter 15: Under the Faint Purplish Red Moon (Part 3 of 3) 

   After I finished speaking, I turned around angrily, and forgot to say a water incantation to remove the water droplets from my soaking wet body. But just as I took a step forward, my upper arm was grabbed back by a sudden force, that strong force pulled me back and my body was pressed onto the trunk of the Phoenix Tree next to the pond. 

  Because of the sudden strong pressure onto the Phoenix Tree, all the flowers on the tree started to fall onto the floor, these brilliantly red petals descended silently onto the ground. In the midst of the rain of petals, Phoenix stood tall in a robe of white, his robes were half opened, his brows and hair were wet and the droplets of water fell from his head. One drop by one drop these water crystals slid down his chest and into his robes, into somewhere far away, a place that one could no longer find. 

   With my back against the rough bark of the trunk, my wet clothes caused my body to be more sensitive, and I could only feel the fiery hot pain searing through my back. I tried to struggle but froze under Phoenix's murderous killing gaze and aura. 

  "You...you... what do you want...?" Finally I managed to force some words out of my throat but these words were torn apart by the touch of Phoenix's cold hands. 

   "What do I want? Naturally, I want to find out how you will make it so I will no longer be able to use this part? Hmmm...?" The lift at the end of his tone was like the sharp edge of the blade that cut through a tight string in my brain, I couldn't help but shudder. He remained unmoved, he released my upper arms which had been so forcefully pressed until they had became numb, inch by inch, his hands moved towards my neck. His movements were almost gentle, but his expression was the complete opposite. It made one think of a predator before it attacked its prey, bloodthirsty and cruel. 

  The moon was in the sky, the evening wind was chilly. The bright clean light of the moon shone down and fell into the pond, lighting it up with its silvery beams. The water reflected the sky, it was so clear and bright that there was nowhere to hide. 

  Under the moonlight, Phoenix slowly moved closer, his gentle but strong fingers slowly tightened around my throat. I had no strength and tried to struggle, but my breath became weaker and weaker, shorter and shorter. I finally realised that I had became Mr Dong Guo*, kindly saving someone, but now he wanted to sentence me to death. Just as I was about to suffocate, I decided to catch my last trace of breath and choked out, "Ph....Pho...Phoenix."




    Phoenix suddenly released his fingers around my neck, and gave me an alluring smile that would intoxicate everyone. I gazed at him in confusion as my chest rose up and down. A wind blew by, the clouds softly floated in the dark night and covered the moon. In one moment, everything darkened.

  In this peaceful and quiet moment, I only felt him lower his head. A pair of moist lips pressed onto my equally moist lips, the lips pressed upon all sides without leaving any empty space, these thin slightly cold lips were like the river water washing by the pebbles, moist and gleaming, it enticed one's senses. He reached out his hand and held onto the back of my head, his body pressed towards me, there was no space between us. My gasp for breath was swept away by the intrusion of the edge of his tongue. As I just escaped the threat of my life, my heart couldn't help relaxing, and slowly I became curious and kissed him back. Phoenix's whole body trembled, as if his body was suddenly filled with a burning heat. My back had been abraded by the rough bark of the tree and I did not know if it was painful or hot, being pressed upon by the front and back, I only felt like a water dumpling that was being boiled, and felt my limbs lose its strength.

   In a moment, my back was empty and cold. Phoenix placed me at the side of the pond, I did not know when his clothes had been removed. I daringly looked at his strong chest, it was in this silence and stillness, that it felt like some energy was being stored. 

   As my gaze slowly lowered, I saw something strange, my heart stirred, I couldn't help being curious, the first time when I saw him in the Water Boundary, it did not appear like this...

   The sound of Phoenix's panting deepened, I lifted up my head, my gaze knocked into his passionate determined gaze. I felt like I was in a trance - put under a spell by the smooth contours of his bone structure, my hand reached out to touch his collarbone, suddenly I felt that I was not frightened by anything. 

   He grabbed both of my hands, and slowly placed each finger in his mouth and kissed it, I couldn't help lightly trembling, the ten fingers connected to the heart, in one moment, I felt my heart being filled to the brim.

   Under the faint purplish red moon, the osmanthus scent surrounded my body, and I suddenly realised this was the sweet scent of wine. After finishing my fingers, he licked my ear lobes and started to move down. I then realised that not only him, but my clothes had unravelled without my knowledge, there was only the starlight on my body. 

  The beautiful flower petals that floated in the shallow water rise and fell with my body, but what was more densely intimate than the flowing water was Phoenix's kiss, from the back of my ear to my neck, from the side of my chest to the top, this usually proud and arrogant man circled around me, as if he was land that had suffered drought and was finally receiving rain, he passionately occupied each inch of my skin.

  Although my consciousness was overwhelmed, my body was as sensitive and aware as I could be. I only felt a sense of burning, as if my whole body was going to be incinerated in this burn. In my misty consciousness, I thought that Phoenix's nirvana burning could not be as hot as this.

  He did not dominate over me, and I forgot to run away.

  My heart beat was like thunder, as if something was filling me up, I opened my mouth and foreign broken sounds fell out in fragments. I did not know what that was but I felt something pierced into my body. That startling pain, the shock was like the first sound of thunder in spring, that broke through the sky. Then suddenly, after that moment of clarity, I fell into a fantasy-like state with clouds and mists surrounding me. 

  Although I was thinking that I should push away this person who brought me pain, my mouth went to bite his shoulder and won't let go. The breathing sounds of the person accelerated. 

  In that moment, the wind did not move, the water did not move, the cloud did not move, time was stilled. There was only a person rising and falling. 

  While walking it appeared like there was a chance of spring rain, but after a sleep, one felt relaxed like a cloud on a high mountain.** 

   The red phoenix flowers floated upon the water ripples, a delicate red drop went out of the body, and followed the ripples and disappeared. 

  "Ph...Phoenix..." I did not know if it was pain, if it was warm, if it was chaos, I only leaned on his chest and continuously repeated his name, even I did not know if I was asking him not to stop, to stop or to continue. 

    Our dark hairs tangled in the water, our naked arms entangled under the moonlight. After the ripples in the water ceased, he pulled me to his chest, his heart was beating extremely fast, it was too full too full, he could not pretend any longer, and it spread out of his lips.

   "Jin Mi... Jin Mi... Jin Mi..." He steadfastly looked at me, steadfastly called for me, steadfastly held my chin, the heat in his eyes was burning, it was as if I just reached out, I would be able to grab the stars in his gaze. 

  The sky as our blanket, the water as our hut. 

   In this night, under the burning red flower tree, in the clear pond, time and time again, I was entangled with this person who only a moment ago wanted to strangle me to death. 

  So, this was the mutual cultivation the Moon God had spoke of. What a painful mutual cultivation. 

    Today was the eighth day of the second month, it was good for marrying, good for making alliances, good for moving house, good for travelling, good for burying...

   In all, it was a good day to do everything with no taboos! 
    
  

*Mr Dong Guo is a character in a story who saved a wolf, but the wolf still wanted to eat him.
** Dian Xian was quoting a line of famous chinese poetry and I translated it to capture the meaning.


Comment: Haha, I am very curious to see what the response is like to this pretty epic scene.

Jin Mi has now crossed a line - what tremors will this bring? 

48 comments:

  1. OMG OMG OMG!! IDK what to say! this is obviously caught me off guard. I DID NOT EXPECT phoenix to just.. :o OMG..... ahhahaha damnn... I'm speechless.. hahahah

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    1. Hahahaha. I was speechless the first time too. Like omg, did what I read just happened? Actually the scene is quite thoughtful, and I only realised some nuances after I translated it. I hope I did Dian Xian's writing justice.

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    2. it's such a :O kind-of-chapter... OMG. hahaha I'm so happy that there is some progress between Ji Min and Phoenix. LOL and it's such fast progress too. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TRANSLATING SUCH AMAZING CHAPTER :D

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    3. Hahaha I'm very happy you liked it! It makes all the effort worthwhile ♡

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  2. O.M.G. I'm speechless too


    Thank you for the translation

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    1. Pats pats! Re-read the scene a few times and the shock wears off.

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  3. Very steamy scene written in a poetic way which makes it even more fiery. Thanks for translating this. Were you blushing?

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    1. I agree with your very succint description!

      I found the previous part of Chapter 15 (part 2) more awkward to translate to be honest! Part 3 was quite poetic with lots of smokes and mirrors, so it was interesting to translate, not awkward at all actually.

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    2. Agree...I didn't even feel like I needed to blush while reading this. It was very interesting written & translated by you.

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    3. Thank you! The genius is in Dian Xian's writing, and it was interesting to translate by try to keep the chinese aesthestic of the scenery and scene.

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  4. What a hot chapter. I need to fan myself. Even though it was a hot scene, the writing was poetic. It made the scene intimate, soft and lyrical. I love her writing style!

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    1. Yes, I love Dian Xian's writing style. To be honest, I may have softened some of the rough edges because I decided to emphasise on the poetic aspects as compared to the brutality that lies within. :)

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  5. Wow! Did that just happen? Really? They did it! I'm not even concerned about the moral, I'm just concerned that Jin Mi does not even know the meaning of what they just did nor the fact that Phoenix does not have an ounce of idea that she has no clue at all. He loves her to the moon and back, just too bad that he does know her train of thoughts. I think in this story, Night knows best how Jin Mi's mind works, if only he has pure intentions, I would be more than happy to ship them together. There is nothing more long lasting and joyful than being in a relationship with a person who knows and understands you and accepts you the way you are.

    Nevertheless, this chapter is just too beautiful.... and sinful.

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    1. Haha, best three words: They did it!

      I think you bring up a very good point. The first time I read this scene I was like ehhhhh??!!! what??!!! But the next few times I read it, especially in translating it, I think Jin Mi definitely had agency and she consented to it. We can't really treat Jin Mi as say a child/minor - she's only unfeeling and not completely unaware. I think she knows what she got herself into, and the rest of the novel corroborates this. :)

      I love that you wrote "he loves her to the moon and back". I think Phoenix's love is very much rooted in action and anger though... he has this, I want to kill you for how much you hurt me kind of thing going on. I think Night knows Jin Mi's mind best also because he can be clear-headed about it, he simply does not love Jin Mi as much as Phoenix.

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  6. "as if he was land that had suffered drought and was finally receiving rain" - spot on in describing phoenix yearning for Jin Mi.

    This part was double wow, I gotta go back and a read again to digest this. It was beautifully written and decembi I think you did a great job in translating this scene to English, so poetic and sinful as cathydear mention yet it wasn't overbearing

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    1. I love that phrase too, sutekii! Dian Xian knows her Phoenix best.

      Thank you!!! I tried my best. Hardest part to translate so far.

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  7. O_O... soooo hot... **need to change the air-con temperature in my room**

    actually, Im afraid of what Night will do if he finds out the girl he supposed to be married to is err now belong to Phoenix...

    and Jin Mi..with this happening to her, will she finally get to remove the unfeeling pill? I wonder...

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    1. Teehee, you won't have to wait long. Night appears in Chapter 16.

      I can't remember when exactly, but it is removed before chapter 20 if I'm not wrong.

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  8. yes Dian Xian really wrote a poetic and tasteful mutual cultivation scene ;)

    and you translated quite well. the picture you chose for this scene also fits it perfectly !

    i wonder why did Phoenix pretend to suffocate Jin Mi in the earlier part of this scene though?

    -lemonsalt

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    1. Thank you! I chanced across this picture ages ago :)

      I don't think Phoenix was pretending. I think he really wanted to kill Jin Mi in that moment haha.

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    2. Yeh I don't think he was pretending either. As he always said in frustration "I think I'm going to kill you one of these days!"

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    3. Gives new meaning to the phrase, I love you to death!

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    4. haha, oops i thought too highly of Phoenix. i thought because it was from Jin Mi's perspective so everything is very skewed/biased. but i guess that's a very important part for Phoenix, no wonder he's so mad ;)

      so far no one has commented on this except fangorn: although this was a very lovely scene for the two leads (i do think they had a mutual desire/love for each other), it was unfair to Night since Jin Mi was rightfully betrothed to him. but you can't really blame Jin Mi because of her strange notions of mutual cultivation and free love thanks to Master Pu Chi and Phoenix's uncle.

      -lemonsalt

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    5. That's why I loved Phoenix's entrance in part 1 of chapter 15. When he enters with a sword dripping with flesh blood to an important god meeting where they just decided Night and Jin Mi's wedding date! It hints at the potential destruction Phoenix must wreck and how he is a warrior lover!

      I think in Phoenix's POV, he thinks he has first dibs on Jin Mi, since he knew her first, fell for her first, and he also thinks that Jin Mi truly and genuinely loves him, except for that pesky marriage contract that was instituted even before she was born. I did feel for Night though!

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  9. Tastefully written and beautifully translated. Thank you Decembi, you so dont disappoint!

    Oh Phoenix.. you really don't do things by half measures! I am happy for him that in that moment he thought his love wad requited. If only to Jin Mi "mutual cultivation" was not so on par with say "dining together"! I love how he loses his calm and cool when she is concerned ^_^

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    1. Awww yay! I'm really glad this met your expectations ♡

      I think Phoenix and Jin Mi mutually pushes each other's buttons and my reading is that Jin Mi really does have feelings for Jin Mi

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    2. Oops I meant Jin Mi does have feelings for Phoenix

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    3. Super-latte, I saw you on Shushengbar!

      Did your husband catch you reading this steamy chapter? xD

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  10. OMG *DEAD*

    Lola

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  11. Ive read this chapter and i'm still in awe *open mouth*

    I dunno what to say...except for,

    Supee Thanks decembi.... more pls! ;)

    - samie

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    1. Awww teehee hope the chapter was worth the wait

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  12. I meant, ive.read it again and again.... on & on *sigh* such words... can it be more vivid?

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    1. I know! The way Dian Xian described the interacts of the elements with their bodies - it was very real

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    2. Phoenix supposedly strangled Jin Mi but she, bite his shoulder hard! Hope, it'll be mentioned later that the.bite left a permanent mark....rememberin The day! *swoon*

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    3. Teehee! That is a good point. I shall look out for the sexy bite mark <3

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  13. Thank you for the translation!! now I understand why it was so awkward to translate this. even reading this chapter on a computer in public feels awkward. hahahaha. thanks for your effort! Totally cant wait to see night's response.. poor night :'(

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    1. Hahahaha it's so intimate right? Sigh falling in love with someone who already has another love never ends well

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    2. yes. but i salute phoenix for being so daring! he is totally out of his mind. the fact that it is outside for everyone to see make it worse

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    3. Hahaha! No one is around though, Phoenix kicked all the attendants out that night previously in his anger

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    4. That's how I'm coming to end the story. They made love and live happy ever after. Lol

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    5. Hahahaha! Still have lots more of excitement ahead ♡

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  14. i wonder if she'll got preggie by this.... i cant wait. how i wished i could read chinese.

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    1. Hahaha i did not even think of the consequences at this pt! ;)

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  15. �� I didn't want this to happen...
    For her innocence to be robbed of so abruptly
    Without her knowing what had happened
    This is too cruel
    I was supporting Night too
    Even though I knew the author was going to pair her up with Phoenix....

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    1. This is definitely one of the most ambiguous scenes!

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